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Tuesday Sunburn Bloging (and editing)

Update: Sunburns remain a painful phenomenon that you do not want to experience.


But guess what makes up for it? I found treasure!

In other good news, one of my favourite authors ever has something new out!

They keep asking why he loves her. They say that he knows nothing about her. He tells them that they must be crazy.

The first moment he saw her, he knew she was beautiful.

When she warned her friends about his shards, he knew she had extraordinary powers.

When he stole her and leapt off a cliff, she screamed and he knew she was afraid. The moment they were back on level ground, they were attacked, and she began to berate him. These events combined proved she was crazy. A) "These events combined" reminds me a bit too much of something you might find in a late highschool/freshman year of college term paper. It's too professorial. B)"Proved" sticks out and ruins the uniformity and pattern of repeating "he knew"s that you have throughout most the rest of the piece. If you could somehow consolidate this and the next paragraph where you use "prove" instead of "he knew" I think it'd go a long way to restoring that sense of uniformity. C) This could just be me being dense, I didn't see the "Fears heights, but not demons proves crazy" meaning until you spelled it out later on.

When she stood up to him to save the kitsune, she proved she had some loyalty. When she ran, saving the fox-child by putting herself at the mercy of the angry pack, she proved she was loyal to the death.

When he tried to claim her, she struck him, and he knew she was impulsive. Then she started to chastise him again, so he knew she had a temper.

When she agreed to help even though he had kidnapped her, he knew she was forgiving.

When she ignored the harpies, screaming once again when they leapt up the cliff, she proved a second time that she was afraid of heights, not demons. She was clearly insane.

When she grabbed a discarded bow and arrow and unflinchingly joined the battle,Suggestions here are much less helpful, the best I can manage is that "unflinchingly" feels out of place. she proved she was brave.

When she saved one of his men, she showed she was compassionate, and when her single arrow tore the demon in half, she confirmed that she was powerful.

When she saw the hanyou, her expression proved beyond any doubt that she was in love.

When she stood against the man she loved for his sake, costing herself the dog’s goodwill and two jewel shards, she proved she was completely nuts.

They keep asking him why he loves her. They say that he knows nothing about her.

He just tells them it’s because she’s crazy... and apparently, so is he.